8th issue, April 1997

POLITICS! Eonacy is really becoming an issue in our dear country. Nowhere in the world, not even in the Universe are so many people involved in such a high-standard debate. We are more than 2 100 citizens and we' re certainly proud, free and interactive!

Managing Editor: Lars Vilks Executive Editor: Vera Porad
The editors are not responsible for unrequested material sent to Ladonia Herald. We reserve the right to edit any contribution, and we take no responsibility as for incorrect use of the language (except our own). For letters, graphic material, questions, feedback, texts etc please feel free to mail us.

POLITICS	The presidents shows his muscles with a number of decrees, though threatened by a coup d'état. Is the queen generous or is she a wicked capitalist? The Peace Party rebels.
STATE OFFICES	The State Office of Nomads will ensure that we will never become oppressed.
HISTORY	Further notes from the life of Old King Ladon and a sleeping hippopotamus.
MINISTERS &AMBASSADORS	We are gifted with a number of new ministers and the staff of ambassadors is steadily increasing as the spirit of eonacy enlightens the world.
CITIZENS	We are certainly not loved by all... But remember, without resistance we are yet unable to grow!
AT THE END OF THE DAY	Our worthy Minister has visited the healthy Swiss Alps and inhaled the Hale Bopp Comet, fumes and beer.

AFTER THE ELECTION
Who is in power?

We have a dramatic scenario in Ladonia since the election. As the constitution elected hardly is more than an outline there is still much to find out. There are four major concentrations in the lead of the state: Our queen, Her Royal Majesty Ywonne I Jarl with her court, our dear Mr President Fernando, the ministers of the cabinett and the Peace Party that won the political election. Though it sometimes seems that everyone is ruling the country this somewhat chaotic order has worked out quite well. It is obvious that the real power goes with those who are active and there is a lot of activity in Ladonia at the moment.
Ladonia has now more than 2.100 citizens. I invite all of them to Ladonia Board. That is the place to create an important part of the history of our country: Daily life in Ladonia.

LORD ASLAK VIKING INVOLVED IN A COUP D'ETAT?

On April 2nd our most dear minister of propaganda Lord Aslak proposed the cabinet to dismiss the president Fernando. For a moment Ladonia was shaken by something that looked like a revolution. President Fernando firmly entered the situation asserting himself as head of state. Political analysts in Ladonia mean that the initiative by Lord Aslak probably was a demonstration concerning the activities of Mr president Fernando. No one had heard from him during more than three weeks and it is plausible that Lord Aslak with this amusing incident tried to pull the trigger of the alarm.

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FERNANDO'S ORDER

"Considering all suggestions received and acting in the best interests of our beloved country, I hereby officially promulgate the following presidencial decrees:

1) Presidencial Decree Number PD-001/97
The coronation day for the Queen and the inaguration day for the President of Ladonia will be 19 April 1997.

2) Presidential Decree Number PD-002/97 The presidencial term is fixed in three years, starting on 19 April 1997. The presidential elections will always have to take place three months before the end of the presidencial term.

3) Presidentianl Decree Number PD-003/97
All Ladonian Citizens aged 50 and up are automaticatly members of The Ladonia Elders Council. The council has an advisory status and should regulate itself when its freely members decide to convene.

4) Presidential Decree Number PD-004/97
State Secretary Lars Vilks is entitled to refresh the country' s cabinet. All inactive members should be removed from their posts. A new and completely up-dated list of ministers and officials should be published in the next issue of the "Ladonian Herald"

5) Presidential Decree Number PD-005/97
The Ladonian Site in the Internet should have a special link to the new section "Laws and regulations of Ladonia". This new section should be developed by State Secretary Lars Vilks and minister Vera Porad. It must include all Presidencial Decrees and other official determinations taken by authorities of the country. Finally, a bulletin board should be installed, as soon as possible, in order to gather all possible suggestions to be included in the country's constitution.

6) Presidential Decree Number PD-006/97
Ladonia has four instances of power, as follows, in this order:
a - The President.
b - The Queen.
c - The Cabinet of Ministers.
d - The Peace Party.
These four instances of power should convene in all occasions that State Affairs are discussed and decisons have to be taken.

7) Presidential Decree Number PD-007/97
The President and the Queen have the power of veto about all matters in Ladonia.

8) Presidential Decree Number PD-008/97
Only the President of Ladonia is entitled to appoint ministers. All suggestions must be submmitted to the Presidency of Ladonia.

Ladonia prim-aevus!
Long live the Queen!! Viva the President!!

Fernando Rodrigues
President of Ladonia"

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MINISTERS INTO THE GLACIER

Through decisions of the cabinet and in support of presidential decree 004/97 passive ministers are to be put into the Glacier. That is, they will remain as possible forces, historical artifacts, still prospering with the grandeur of a ghost-cabinet. This procedure is going on in an amiable way: "Let us be sacrificers not butchers". In the Glacier we can find two groups: "Stand By-Ministers" and "Immobile Ministers".
The minister of internet, Anders Löwdin, has in a brilliant fashion set up the active ministers on the homepage of Ladonia: "Administration".
Minister of Chance has added a suggestion concerning how to bring the some of our ministers into the Glacier.
"I think we should take a list of inactive ministers (and wordy ones), put their names in a hat, and draw a name each week - for puttng in the glacier. A fully deterministic routine will not be good."

Svein Olav Nyberg
Minister of Chance, Ladonian government
Official: http://www.aim.se/ladonia/
Private: http://www.maths.ed.ac.uk/~solan/homepage.html

- A worthy proposal; chance must be considered as one of the greatest possibilities to handle our spiritual needs. Chance must be given a real chance.

NEW TERRITORY FOR LADONIA

"We, the Queen of Ladonia and the Jarl of Bjoerksaeter hereby proclaim our estate Bjoerksaeter as Ladonian territory on the following premises.

1) The Jarl estate is to remain property of the Jarl family.
2) Ladonia has the right to defend the Bjoerksaeter territory.
3) Ladonian citizens has the right to visit the territory. Entrance and exit is free (also for other nationalities). The Jarl Palace and barn with surrounding lot and yard should be avoided in respect of the privacy of the Jarl family.
4) Ladonian citizens has the right to pay ladonian taxes by contributing their creativity to the Jarl estate.
5) Visits to the Jarl estate should be announced to the Jarl family in advance.
6) Bjoerksaeter is declared a nature reserve.
7) Bjoerksaeter is the seventh county or rather an earldom of Ladonia. It is also called Far Ladonia.

The Bjoerksaeter county is approx. 40 acres large of which some 20 acres is fields, 7.5 acres is pasture and 10 acres is woods. The county is intersected into two halfs by a swedish trunk road (no 53) in a NW-SE direction. In the North eastern part there is a scattered old mixed forest and an old pasture that needs quite a lot of creativity before it is restored again. In the north an area of 5 acres has been planted with oak plants and larches in between as nursing plants. Closer to the trunk road is a 10 acre field which is currently used for hay production and an intended oats harvest. On the other side of the road lies some other fields used for agriculture. In the SW is the Jarl Palace situated aswell as the other buildings of the estate. The palace is a timbered house with yellow panel originally built 1910. Since then it has been renovated several times and extensions have been made. The latest, a glass veranda, is not yet finished but subject to much creativity to be.
The roof of the barn is currently being exchanged into a green roof to remind the visitor of the colour of our flag. The surrounding lot and yard is badly in need of a lot of creativity to be representative of the Queen."
Hopefully a map will be added to the Ladonia Homepage soon showing Far Ladonia and how to get there.
Long live Ladonia and may it grow.

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THE PEACE PARTY REBELS AGAINST THE QUEEN'S EXPROPRIATION

- Bjoerksaeter is situated some 100 km southwest of Stockholm. This contribution concerns Queen Ywonne I Jarl's proposal for an incorporation of the estate of Björksäter into Ladonian territory.
We, in the Peace Party, see it as our duty to inform our citizens of the consequences of such an act. At first glimpse, it seems like an act of divinity by our Queen, to make about 162 squarekilometres into Ladonian territory. But the proposal (as we regard it, due to the lack of discussion around the change), if it is executed, will in fact mean the full introduction of capitalism. One of the premises attached to the transactions, is that the estate will remain in the family Jarl's ownership.
What de facto happens, is that 99,4% of Ladonian territory will be in private ownership, and furthermore by the same owner.
Our Queen didn't bother to contact us in the Peace Party, before making the transaction (proposal). Therefore there has been no discussion, whatsoever, about HOW the incorporation should be done. We have therefore, hastily, discussed the matter, and come up with some counter proposals, as to adjust Her Majesty's stand.
Is Ladonia going to become a copy of our neighbour countries or is the creativity and eonatic spirit going to rule? We suggest the latter. The born of Ladonia, the long struggle for Nimis and the realisation of the Ladonian territory, was an heroic conquest. The landstrip is now common ground for all of us ladonians. There is no private property, except for the capitals.
In our view Ladonian ground must be common ground. Private ground outside the conquered Ladonia should be regarded as allied territory and not Ladonian. We also suggest that such private alliances, could apply for a special name, starting with Lad-, then continuing with any suffix that doesn't begin with an -o-. That could be, for example, Ladabria, Laduria and so on. Why then is it necessary to prevent the distribution of the name "Ladonia" amongst private hands? Don't we trust our dear citizens? Of course we do, but this is a matter of principles. When Ladonian population becomes larger, more and more citizens will apply for the name (or is Her Majesty the only one that could use it?). Sooner or later the name will be used in commercial transactions as a trade mark or in other businesses, beyond the control of the administration and the leading party. In preventing the merging of private property and the name "Ladonia", we should be able to stop the pressure from outside norms and values, at least for a while, creating space for Ladonia to grow in it's own, eonatical way. Our counter proposition is a creative one, because anyone can apply for a name to their lot, suggesting a name themselves and specifying the territory. In this way we will increase the diversity and create a new way of incorporating people into the communication of our land. It would though require a new administrative unit, which could be named Bureau of Alliances, BOA, which would take care of registration and presentation of our alliances. It could eventually develope into it's own forum, with interaction and creativity as a result. We in the Peace Party is concerned with the integrity of our land and by the counterproposal we are taking the responsibility, which have been given by the voters, for protecting Ladonia from bad developments and steering it into a prosperous future.

Best Regards

Erik "Ekan" Johansson (Vice Precident and Leader of the Peace Party)

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TROND IVAR HANSEN AND THE STATE OFFICE OF NOMADS

Brilliant Count Torby has expanded his department through appointing Trond Ivar Hansen as head of the State Office of Nomads. Trond Ivar explains his ideas with this text:
The spirit of the Ladonian culture is so nomadic that nobody actually stays permanently in Ladonia, but are usually always somewhere else around the world. It is the way it has always been.
If we are following this great tradition I' m sure that it will keep our people free to all oppressors, and therefore I suggest that we make a new department to ensure that our nomadic tradition is alive and remembered. I would like to be the head of this very important office. Johan Anderson mentions something about it: "To have all ministries on the same horizontal level, keeps the diversity on the surface and it will shine in its colours at the curious and nomadic-minded ladonian (nomads are used to wander about, not following straight routes)." (I would of course always stay on this level he talks about). Nomadism beeing such an important subject, resting in the core of the heart of every ladonian man and women and thing, needs someone to keep the tradition alive, in this way:

1. Collecting the nomadic customs of our modern ladonian people.

2. Dig in the history of the earths (and others) nomadic peoples, and present these peoples customs and ways of living, for support and good ideas to the nomadic ladonians of today.

3. Reminding our people, from time to time, not to stay put, but travel and wander from time to time.

Our motto could be: "Change" (or the same in latin, maybe).

Trond Ivar Hansen
Welhavensgate 77, 5006 Bergen
Tlf: 55 96 04 71
e-mail: tihansen@online.no

Artwork at: http://www.yi.com/home/RidderstolpeGustaf/ and under alias NEMOLOM at: http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Lofts/4125/

Magister Mundi sum!

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NOTES ON LADONIAN HISTORY

Our Minister of History, Count Torby, Lord of Roses, has made further research in old manuscripts. With some additions and in a modern languages we can follow some events in King Ladon's life:

Ladonian history, part I
As we all know time was (probably, since later findings concering the nature of time has some mysterious knots yet to be resolved) set in motion when the dragon Ladon was guarding the golden apples of the Hesperides. The apples with the gift of immortality, which all of the world was hunting in vain. The poor dragon Ladons task was also in vain since the somewhat shortsighted hero Hercules could not find out a better way to pinch an apple than to slay Ladon. There is some who mean that Hercules actually fooled Atlas, the father of the hesperides, to steal his daughters apples while Hercules took over the labour of carrying the heavens on his shoulders. If this is right our noble historians still quarrel about. Thus immortality was placed in the world and the act introduced the struggle between mortal and immortal time. Now the hesperides, Aegle, Erythia, Vesta and Arethusa, who actually had Ladon as some sort of watchdog became wery sorry for this and decided to plead for Ladon at the place of herr Beta, a wery unknown god. Anyway he had the possibility to wake Ladon up again. Unfortunately as a human being.
Ladon stretched himself, gave a yarn, and wondered wherever he was. Vesta, being a kind woman, noticed the puzzled look on his face and explained.
- Oh, eh, what? Wondered the still puzzled Ladon and by this we have concluded that his wits were not of the most brilliant sort. Since the apples where gone and Hercules only left some seeds there was no point in staying. Ladon tried to think of what to do next and could not. But Vesta had fell in love with him and decided that Ladon and she would travel to the oracle in Delfi and there ask for advice. They took the remaining seeds with them, though Ladon wondered what for. But how would they get there? Ladons wits, as we know, was not of the best sort so he proposed a walk. At this stupid notion Vesta took a slight jump and wondered what she would do with Ladon, found nothing better than to just tell him to come along and meet a friend of hers. Jason, a lively chap who had in his mind to hunt for some sheepskin high in the mountains of Kolchis. But what happened to him is another story. In the ladonian history we have found a note that says that Ladon and Vesta got a lift with Jason and the argonauts to Delfi. Here the notes are indecipherable for the moment. In my studies I will try to dechipher them, since I understand that the historic notes continues with some events in Delfi and how Ladon and Vesta traveled on and came to land on the far coast of Thule.

Credo quia absurdum

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part II

The story of king Ladon, first of all kings in Ladonia, is of a somewhat confused kind. This we have found after a scrupulous historic research in the chronicles of king Torkel IV. When we last left the worthy king Ladon he and the lady Vesta were on their way to ask the oracle in Delfi where to go next. They had a nice little seavoyage with Jason and were left on the shore. Now Ladon and Vesta looked around and fund the surroundings astounding. North of Delfi they saw Parnassos with clouds whirling around the top. Since it happened to be morning and the sun was just risen the whole mountain looked like clad in gold. But, they had a place to go and could not stay and let the beauty sink in to their minds.
Where was the way to the pythia, the oracle who was to tell them their way? Luckily enough they found a fisherman on the shore, occupied with tangling out his nets. The crispy smell of the sea poured out from the man and Ladon found this slightly annoying so he turned to Vesta and asked her to go to the fisherman. Well, she went, asked but got no more than a finger that pointed on a sign, posted on the shore. This way to the oracle, it said. And beside there was a small road leading inland. Trotting on the way Ladon and Vesta soon came to some cliffs, full of strange inscriptions and lucky enough another sign that led them to the opening of a cave. Obviously this was the entrance. Steps echoing in the dusk, water dripping from stalactites and an eerie gren ligth gave the place just the right atmosphere for a mysterious oracle.
Farther in the light changed to a red flickering on the rocky walls and in the middle they found a great white stone, perfectly round. Upon it sat a slightly fat woman, inhaling fumes from a chasm behind the stone. She actually seemed to be in trance, or stoned , or something.
- Eh, excuse us worthy lady, we are here to ask for guidance, Vesta said.
Ladon only stared. The woman on the stone happened to be butt naked and Ladons eyes nearly jumped out of their sockets. Vesta kicked him.
- Whaddaya want nincompoops, the pythia thundered, her voice seemingly coming from all directions.
Now Ladon waked up from his trance (Vestas kick in his ass probably helped a bit too) and stuttered something about going somewhere, but that he did not know exactly where.
- I see that your wits are not of the best kind, the pythia declared but anyway started to prophecy. This was after all her occupation.
- You, Ladon, are going to be king of a far away country. Your way there will go under mountain, over mountain and through water, in water and water in you. You will have nothing in the end though you will be the richest. Go north, go north and do not falter on your way. Ladon didn´t understand anything but had the common sense to bow deep for the pythia and step back. The oracle obviously would not say anything more to him.
- As for you, Vesta, the future is shrouded in mist, but I see that you will not go as far as Ladon. In the city of the twins that where rasied by a wolf, you will find your destiny. Bowing deep, Ladon and Vesta left the abode of the pythia, now coughing of all the fumes in the cave.
Worthy readers of ladonian history. Again the notes becomes somewhat difficult to read, but we promise to come back with more.

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JOHAN ANDERSSON, CUSTODIAN, GIVES A REPORT
FROM AN EXPEDTION DEEP INTO LADONIA

Further notes on Ladonian history (3)

Proceedings from the first Field Research Expedition, 1st of March 1997. We arrived to Ladonia by Highway 1, crossing the border station Tall, making our way down to Nimis. Remains from the fire could be seen everywhere and we stopped for a moment, contemplating, trying to reconstruct the Tower of the Ascendant in our minds. Approximately at this time the sun disappeared behind some high clouds and never returned during the rest of the expedition. For some reason, which I can't explain, I left the Highway and started to walk up a rather steep hill and soon found myself on a plateau at the west border of our beloved country, by Håle Stenar. From there I could see the whole of Ladonia with all its magnificent eonatic constructions silently rocked in its cradle by the calm and swaying Mare Jenny. Then I started to examine the plateau where I was standing. Thats when it happened. Looking to the east, I could see a distinct feature of a skull right in front of me. I would say that the face seemed somewhat natural, but the back of the head was very archaic in its shape, remainding me of some of our biological ancestors, nearly bipedal, with an extended back of the head. The feature, which I instantly defined as a proto ladonian, was staring into the mountainside with an angry expression. I could understand it, because it couldn't glimpse the beauty of the country it had to guard. Very sad indeed.
I was startled by the discovery and when I turned around I discovered something even more peculiar. There, right on the ground in front of me, a hippopotamus was laying on its side. It seemed like it was slumbering, rather than sleeping, because it was smiling though its eyes were closed. It was pointing its long round nose to the north west, as if it was smelling the wind of the sea. To establish a more elaborated communication with the two entities, we will need help from some of our country's spiritual citizens. Perhaps this is a task for the Ministress of guardian angels, Countess Kicki. Even though I wouldn't call the entities angels, they are surely guardians (at the west border) and positively spiritual. Until this has been done, it is hard to establish a time of appearence of our guards, but it should have taken place in conjunction with the arrival of Kung Ladon, at the very beginning of the 1st eonatic age.
The main purpose of the expedition, however, was to investigate the Giant Dolme (Jättedösen, Mulledösen) and the mystical wall of stones, laying some 50 metres beneath the, on slooping ground situated dolmen. The Giant Dolmen has been excavated in the 40's by Oscar Lidén and he concluded, correctly, that it was not a stone age dolmen, but a natural formation; the big boulder which is placed on some smaller boulders, are the resultat of the ice sheets movements some 15000 years ago, or perhaps the boulders have eroded from the mountainside in later times. I noticed that rather large stones had been placed on the dolmens sides, to make it air -and watertight. These manmade improvements seemed old, because of the size of the stones. Inside the dolmen the floor was covered with a 10 cm thick humus-soil layer with suceeding sterile red-soil. At the very back of the dolmen there was a nice flat block to sit on. On the floor near this block I found a very strange, lightweighted stone, about the size of a fist. A geologist has analyzed it, and determined it to be a lava stone. This stone have probably been placed in the dolmen by a human, but by whom and why? I suggest the stone is placed in the book of Arx, accompanied with an eonatic interpretation.
The mystical wall could be a part of a water-enclosure, creating a small harbour and being a breakwater at the same time. If this interpretation is correct, the dolmen and the wall are interconnected. Together they could have been a place of escape from troublesome waters, where the sailors and the fishermen could place the boat safely and then taking cover in the dolmen. But the sea level today is approximately 3 metres below the harbour level. However, during the bronze age (1800-500 BC) the waterlevel reached this altitude, which should date the wall back at least 3000 years. This dating is supported by the rigidness of the construction of the Giant Dolmen.
There are good reasons to return to the Mulle Dolmen in future expeditions, to clarify the picture of its age and function. It will also be interesting to see for how long the proposed hypothesis will stand. Other suggestions are also welcomed.

- We strongly recommend you to follow Johan Andersson's project on Hillman on Ladonia Board. (The Captain Hillman Project Group)

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COUNT TORBY, MINISTER OF HISTORY, STRUCK WITH THE FORCE OF A SLEDGEHAMMER

I ett ögonblick av klarsyn slog mig en idé med kraften av en slägga. Skulle vi inte kunna tänka oss att medborgarna, både adliga och icke adliga, erbjuds att utforma sin egen vapensköld som sedan presenteras med sagde invånares namn? Möjligen kan man tänka sig att begränsa erbjudandet till adeln, men det syns mig vara lite snålt, men kanske praktiskt med tanke på folkmängden... Jag har förstått att administrationen har en tung börda att bära, men på något sätt borde tanken gå att realisera. Bland över 2.000 ladonier måste det med nödvändighet finnas många goda krafter.

- Count Torby is offering the Ladonians to creative their own coat of arms. These items could be presented on the net. In Count Torby's democratic approach the popular minister means that this possibility should be open to all Ladonians. I guess it will be necessary to have a fee for this arrangement, but it is certainlyu a good idea.

LORD SIG WHIG . MINISTER OF IDLENESS

Lord Sig Whig, new minister in Ladonia constantly confirms that he is a man of idleness albeit he works hard in his department. Or rather his secretary who writes down the deep thoughts of the amiable master. He has started a project:

Project: A broad, deep-penetrating longitudinal investigation into all possible benefits to mental and physical health of near-total idleness (NTI). The outcome will be used as educational material from the Ministry of Idleness, more specifically in its prospective campaign "Don't become an Idiot Savant - Know Less".

- Lord Sig Whig in his inimitable style of concise formulation with a mighty blend of shandyism and Machiavellian depth presents his department in this way:

Persuant to our firm commitment to the spread and practicing of idleness, we hereby, on your personal request as per Mars 6 1997, decided to take on the difficult, seemingly impossible, project of more in detail trying to formulate the Ministry of Idleness mission, it's purpose, intentions and goals within a modern civic society limited as it were by countless laws and regulations, stifling demands that every decision be firmly founded on the antiquated concept of democracy, law and order, free speech and similar constraints.
To begin with, our societal long term goal will be to make Ladonia a model nation in a post-modern world with a citizenry of pure bread slobs. To this end we intend to introduce the novel concept of Total Tax Excemption (TTE). This will go hand in hand with the proposition brought forward by our Near Total Idleness Report (perhaps on file somewhere, if someone cares). First mandated will be a hefty budgetary slash and a school shut down and military personnel shipped to Arabia in exchange for sand to our beaches. Laws will be modernized to counteract such rampant phenomena as efficiency, effectivity and an oversized work-to-leisure ratio. Common folks must learn to stay on their home turf, not to bother to work each and every day. The state TV will run more useless shit and teach common people to shaddup and recline with a six-pack as in the words of our National Anthem: 'We couldn't care less - be useless whatever you dooo..' those beatiful words and the rest of the bull manure. In the end, hopefully, we will see the blessings becoming on all Ladonian citizens by shunning work and to become more useless. Uselesness is the key to the future for our kids of all ages. Or as it says on our State Banner:
Stand Tall - Do Less!
Our department will from day one be run from the beach (if someone's out), weekdays except Mon through Fri and days preceeding Holidays a full hour now and then. Foreign delegations and state visits will be entertained, provided they bring their own beer. Port of entry will always be the sea, since to protect our citizens from harmful energetic influence from surrounding nations, the borders will be held closed (gates however being opened now and then on the discretion of Dept of Idleness Officers, who may judge it beneficial to open the to folks who have the sound judgement to bribe with liquid assets).

Goodfornothinghamshire on the Filth of Fartham, 1997.
Yers Truly,
Lord Sigwhig
PS Why don't you come on over an' bring along the cards fer a spell of poker?

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AMBASSADOR OF ELLEORE

We got this letter:

"Dear Mr Secretary,
I am the humble member nr 97-1687. I have earlier suggested that I might be of certain use for Ladonia as an ambassador of the free nation Elleore. Elleore has as oficial language the neolatin language called Interlingua que es completely easy to understand by western educated people. I am fluent in this language and I have already connections with some of the citizens of Elleore. My friend Lord Sighwigh, Mininster of Idleness, has also proposed that I will be suitable for this post.
I humbly ask you to bring the matter further of this appointment. I will do my very best to establish extraordinary good connections between Ladonia and Elleore.
Omnia mea, mecum porto. Sed alquando io lassa alcun cosas apud mi sposa. Mi optime salutationes!"

Jan

Jan Armann
Fagelstigen 21; S-904 21 UMEA, Sverige (Sweden)
Tel & Fax +46 (0)90771525; e-mail: armann@algonet.se
http://www.algonet.se/~armann

- Jan Armann is of course now appointed ambassador and has delivered some further details on Elleore:

Elleore is a kingdom and on the throne sits Queen Leodora I. She has a cabinet helping her govern the country. Elleore is an island situated deep in the firth of Roskilde. It takes 17 minutes by rowing boat from Roskilde to reach the island. Elleore has as permanent inhabitants only birds. It is what the Swedes call fågelskyddsområde. However, the human citizens of Elleore are permitted to visit and stay on the island during one week every year. Elleore has a triangular form with a side of about 400 m. The official language - since 1950 - is a form of neolatin called Interlingua.
I will do my very best to keep warm and friendly connections between our countries. Please, convey my humble veneration to the Queen and the President.

- A note: Lord Sig Whig has enthusiastically supported a relationship with Elleore as something he calls "Partnership for Pilsner". Great politics, Lord Sig Whig!

A WORD FROM SANDOR POSVARI - OUR NEW AMBASSADOR IN BUDAPEST
The connection between Ladonia and Hungary is constantly groing stronger. We have already an embassy handled by Tamas Balogh in Szolnok(as well as we got the exile-cuban ambassador Ernesto Diaz situated in Veszprem,Hungary) They can both be reached at: diaz@mukki.richem.hu
The urgent need for an embassy in Budapest was solved through Sandor Posvari. He is quite well-known to ladonians as he has been active on Ladonia Board and in touch with our administrators. We consider Sandor as a very positive force and have great expactations on him. Extremely welcome, Sandor!

"Dear friends all around Ladonia, It is very honouring for me, to take part - without any rule, upsters among the Cc: Ladonians - in the last couple of days in this debate. As far as I remember we are building our own democracy. Churchill said: the democracy is a bad thing, but nobody knows better. So do we. But: Please follow this debate on the WWWBoard, because I do not think so, that only we are THE Ladonians. There are some other fellows as well. Am I wrong? Of course, if this small Cc: team is a council (I did not know up till now), than I suggest to publish all the letters in the Herald.
PLEASE, stop with fighting for the power! Please try to find the appropriate group (or team) whom are able to establish the teoretical role of Ladonia (instead of Lars, who had all the possibilities, but he has other jobs). PLEASE understand, that Ladonia more, much more than a country, where you can buy some labels. It should be a new phase of the History."
Best regards

@llexx
Posvari Sandor H-Budapest http://euroastra.interdnet.hu
http://www.c3.hu/greenpoint

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A SHORT REMARK FROM DAVID STANSVIK, MINISTER OF LITERATURE

Indeed very short and full of content:
"I am active."

- Very clear, Mr Stansvik is certainly not a Glacier-case.

A SHORT REMARK FROM TIIT MATHIESEN, MINISTER OF BRAIN, ON THE MINISTER OF HEALTH:

"The Minister of Health is not good at setting limits; he is transgressing them."

A LETTER FROM MADELEINE GLOVER, MINISTER OF TENNIS AND FIGURE SKATING

Honorable Secretary of State of Ladonia:

I would like to take this opportunity to thank you and the cabinet for my appointments as Ambassador to Wisconsin and as Minister of Tennis and Figure Skating. To report on local politics in Wisconsin: yesterday, April 1, 1997, Wisconsin had local elections. The city of Madison, for the first time in its history, elected a female Mayor, Sue Bauman, and a female county Executive, Ms. Falk. Both are very able and will serve the people well.
Tennis: Martina Hingis defeated such top players at the Lipton Tennis Tournament in Florida, as Monica Seles, Steffi Graf and Olympic Champion Ms. Davenport. Ms. Hingis thus became the Number One Player. Figure Skating: World Ladies' Champion, Miss Tara Lipinski put in in appearance at two talk shows on April 1, 1997. First she was a guest at the very popular Rosi O'Donnel daytime show then in the evening she graced the David Letterman show, while sencond place winner, Ms. Michelle Kwan showed great wit and maturity on the Tonight Show. I will be visiting Budapest, Hungary at the end of this month. Our new Ambassador to Hungary, His Excellency Dr. Sandor Posvari, has shown great reliability as a worthy representative of Ladonia. We shall spend time discussing mutual interests as Abassadors of Ladonia. Hope you had a fruitful time in Spain.
I concur with you on the date of coronation.

Respectfully,
Madeleine Glover, M.A., M.S.
Vox populi vox Dei

MADELEINE ON THE COMET
Report on Hale-Bob: As Ambassador Extraordinary and Plenipotentiary of Ladonia to Wisconsin, USA I like to report that the Hale-Bob comet has been sighted at 8:00 p.m. US Central time from the back veranda of my residence at a 40 degree position on the North-Western sky of Madison, WI, Number 1 city in the United States according to Money Magazine. The comet is extremely bright with a very long tail and comfortably visible to the naked eye. Currently Hale-Bob is approximately 162,000 miles (259,200 kms) from earth. Once the comet runs its course it will not return to visit the earth for another 3,000 years.

Madeleine Glover, M.A., M.S.
Madison, WI, USA
vox populi vox Dei

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LADISLAUS HORATIUS - Greetings Ladonians

As minister of Sophistry I have two main objectives: Wisdom and folly. Not necessarily in that order.

This can be said to mirror two different views on sophistry. First we have the generally accepted definition: Fallacious reasoning, often driven by dishonesty and/or a desire to cloud issues and with deceit win an advantage.

The second view is very rare. I will illustrate it by a surprisingly unorthodox definition taken from Dictionnaire des Philosophes (Presses Universitaires de France, 1984):

"Le sophiste est ‚tymologiquement un professeur de SOPHIA, c'est … dire, un maŒtre de science et sagesse, ce qui lui distingue du philosophe (ce dernier terme a ‚t‚ invent‚ par les Pythagoriens) qui se contente d'aspirer … un savoir qu'il ne possŠde pas." In other words, the mere philosopher is content with knowledge not really his own! (Perhaps now you understand why I chose to be minister of sophistry, not philosophy.)

Another object of mine is to irritate Sweden, inasmuch as uncovering someone's faults is irritating. (This can be seen as a form of scratching, for Sweden is irritating too.) Sweden is called Ladonia's arch enemy by Ladonians who are not only Swedish citizens, but also in heart and manner and thinking patterns very Swedish.

My observation in a recent communiqu‚ that Ladonians who speak about the "Swedish enemy" in a sense are their own enemies was not taken well (if it was taken at all). This proves to me that there is a certain unacknowledged, unconscious duality at work here.

One can talk about Ladonia's virtues and Swedish enemies until one gets a nose-bleed. However, if Ladonia is to be something more than a roleplay Swedes and some foreigners (most of the active ministers are Swedish) like to play, or another SIG (special interest group), then the question of *what is Ladonian* and *what is Swedish* cannot be evaded for ever. Well, it propably can, but I don't think it should.

At least a differentiation of Swedish qualities that are OK and not OK, from a Ladonian viewpoint (whatever that is), could be made. This is crude, but it is a start. "When I was Swedish I toyed with childish things, but when I become Ladonian..." Then what? You tell me.

Finally, my role as minister of Sophistry also means being a court-jester, killjoy, and a plain NUISANCE (pain in the ass) -- whenever the situation so requires. And when it doesn't.

Ladislaus Horatius -- Minister of Sophistry --

CONTRIBUTION TO THE THEORY OF LADONIA: WHAT IS LADONIA?

At least in its starting point Ladonia is a project. Ladonia is in that sense not "reality" as it can be seen upon as a method of working or fictional construction. When a project is going on during a long period it can, as the case is in Ladonia, be "invaded" of "reality". Things settle, the routines of daily life is constantly working and Ladonia as a project will be blocked out by its content. That is e. g. what has happened with projects like Sweden, Norway, Hungary... Still we will return to a main question of what Ladonia actually is, as it is obvious that the intentions with this country are not simply to copy existing conventional countries. It has been said that Ladonia is a work of art. This identification can be used at least tactically, but it is satisfying to watch that Ladonia surely is working itself out of this trap. Artworks ends in museums and they are closed within the artworld.
Instead we have the problem of the value invested in Ladonia. In the beginning it could be apprehended as some sort of joke. That interpretation was made by the the Swedish Prime Minister (and we are in a way greatful for that). But a joke is something that just is fooling around, normally living just a short life. A joke might change into an institution of joke-making and thus it will become serious. Naturally we strive further with Ladonia, opening the scenario to the strange border of higher values. Some objects and some events are used to invest our most sublime thoughts and spiritual needs. The problem is to find objects and events worthy enough. Ladonia will not be such an object or event; nations are not suitable for this purpose as it just comes pathetic nationalism out of this. Ladonia will just be the ground of the working elements. It should be enough just to look what has been done during the first 10 months of Ladonia.
We are looking for values to appear in Ladonian production, closely looking for transgressions and unusual points of view. It is of course a fact that no object ever will be worthy enough. That knowledge is important to the idea of Ladonia. I guess that the question on what Ladonia is will be replaced by what we actually produce. My vision is that any visitor entering Ladonia should be met with a firework of remarkable features; you know, "This is it!" All sorts of everything is travelling around; we have all the options available to exploit the nature of creativity.

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A TASTELESS COMBINATION OF OLOF PALME AND THE DESTRUCTION OF NIMIS

The following application form landed in Ladonia a short time ago:
name: Olof Palme

address: Kyrkogården

postcode: 000

city: stockholmdate: död

place: död

nationality: svensk

length: ligger ner

eyes: inga

citizen: Nobility

latin: abra kadabra

contribute: Riv detta jävulens bygge eller elda ner skiten

email: Palme@kyrkogården

 

-We might suppose that it is the same vulnerable mind that has composed this parallel:

name: Kuken Nilsson

address: Långarödsvägen 76a

postcode: 26300

city: Höganäs

date: 640713

place: Kiruna

nationality: Kines

length: 255

eyes: Röda

citizen: Common citizen

latin:

contribute: Jag hatar Nimis och ska bränna upp skiten och pissa på askan. Min fru ska även skita på Arx.

email: Göran.persson@stockholm.se

- It seems as if the composer of these poems is not very well off with social democracy, sex and Ladonia. It could be a great idea for our N.N. to study latin. We prefer not to translate the phrases as they could be disturbing to our english-spoken friends.

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-Our noble and amiable Minister of Health is then giving us a few words on cosmic order, in a tranquil way telling us that The times of Pepi II was somewhat more favourable than ours, dismissing the Big Bang theory en passant, all these things which are so good to hear when the day is done and we know that soon we have to be confronted with a new one.
Your Health Minister has just returned from a famous Swiss brewery where you can order beer with cannabis. Looking back, the other night I came out from the late night open gas station with two hotdagos, my dinner that day, and saw the magnificant Hale Bopp above cold and far too bright city lights, her wide and rarefieldfled veil gently arched toward the east, as her bright heart still was accelerating around the sun along her 4210 years long trail (according to certain astronomic calculations) full of desire from the deapths of the dark endless vault above. On her last visit Pharaoh Pepi II reigned in Egypt, and here at the gas station in city lights of no beauty whatsoever, in the last sigh of the second millenium, I saw her again. In Pep II's time the oil came from Lesbanon, and allegedly no knowledge of the wheel existed except the Almighty Divine Sun disk, who rolled over the horizon every night in red robes, hundreds of thousands of times (exactly 1.536.650 times) before I saw his fantastic display of reds and fiery bright glows again among increadibly beautiful and fantastically varied guises of deep blue and liliac between layers of clouds and enormous whirls of mists, as if frozen in time, peeping out from the last sunset windows seat behind the engine of the unforunately short aircraft assigned to SK 619, while the person in the seat ahead of me had pulled down his shade...mankind sleeps. Everything is possible, also to wake up. There is affirmation or denial, certainties and negations do not really exist as we expect them, measurable, absolute, uncangable.
It is quite possible the world was created from a Big Bang, but it wasn't. And I am too old to engage in arguments with young scientists about that. The universe is you, what you are, and then something more, which you absolutely know nothing about, and that means nothing at all. The Pharaoh was the organizer of chaos. He also liked to hunt, to marvel his garden, to enjoy music and dance, in the flickering living light of torches, when the night sky still was totally black as it is no more, with fields of stardust and innumerous brighter gems spread all over, the delights of those days were certainly considerable and the number of his children had to be written with three digits.
We live in an era of moderation, in common sleep. Strange ego personalities are milling about in maddening crowds, having opinions of this and that and another thing, passing judgements and upholding morals - and how easy would it not be to trade all that for simple kindness, to trade human moderation for real inspirational power, and eventueally disease for health, as it was intended in the ever present First Day of Creation.

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Created : 1997-04-17